I have a friend who’s a very different type of person. She is very sweet but sometimes has a hard time asserting herself and I feel as though people take advantage of her kind heart. Just this week someone did something to her and her family that I find to be ridiculous and pretty much unforgivable.
It started that her child went to play at her friends house down the street. She had a set time that she needed to check-in by and then to be home by. No big deal we all have those stipulations on our children, nothing new. I know that I at least had those rules when I was her age (11). So her daughter did not check in, so my friend tried to phone the house and no one answered. My friend then decided a short while later that she should go over there and bring her daughter home because of the rule breaking.
When she arrived at the house she found out the the other little girls mother sent the two 11 year old girls down to a store about 3/4 of a mile away by themselves in the dark. NOT OK!! So my friend decided to stay and chat with the mother while waiting for the girls to arrive. The girls arrived about 10 -15 min later, and my friend was instructing her daughter that she needed to come home now because she was not doing right.
Well being that she is a willful young girl she refused to go home. She is not abused and is rarely grounded for more than the day so realistically she was just giving her mother a hard time. I can’t imagine any tween or teenager that has not done the same. I know that my children have and they are much younger than this child. So the friends mother being intoxicated decided that she would tell off my friend about being such a bad mother etc. she apparently called her many, many derogatory names, and was very violent towards her child as well as my friends daughter calling her some very bad names. Things that you just wouldn’t say to another woman or adult let alone to a child.
My friend told her daughter that it was time to go home and that he father was home and if she wanted to she could go home and cuddle up with him on the couch to watch a movie or something. This little girl was crying and very upset that she had just been called the worst name you can call a woman. So they started to leave.
This other mother (the abusive one) said that she was going to call the police because an 11 year old should not be allowed to cuddle with her father. I personally think that this is ridiculous because even as a grown woman I still cuddle with my father, why is that wrong? I would hope that my children would be close enough to their father to tell them anything as well as sit together to watch a movie. Really what is the harm in that. But this mother believed that it is sexual abuse to sit with your dad on the couch, for some reason which is totally absurd.
So as my friend was walking home the other mom called the police and tried to have the father arrested. She also alleged that the child was being abused physically and mentally which is not the cast. When the police arrived they talked to my friend and daughter as well as the father, it was determined that no crime had been committed but still, how horrible would it be to have the police show up at your front door all because of something completely stupid and false.
This morning at school her daughter was still a bit shaken because she feared that her father was going to be jailed even though he was cleared, (she just didn’t understand) and the little friend that she went walking with was telling the school and all of their friends that her mother was a lesbian (untrue) and that her father was a child molester (also untrue). So when my friends child asked the other girl about it and why she would say something like that, the other little girl called her a (word that shall remain unsaid) and my friends daughter slapped her. Of course the other little girl got off scott free and my friends daughter was suspended from school for a week.
Some one please tell me where the justice is in that. I have to say that if someone called me that name I would probably have slapped her too. Now don’t get me wrong I am not condoning school violence but I think that there was a mistake there. Now I don’t believe that the suspension was necessaraly the wrong thing but I think that BOTH girls should have been in trouble.
I just want to know why people feel the need to be cop callers just because they are unhappy about something stupid. I consider this action to be along the same lines as the people who call 911 because a fast food joint got their food wrong. I just really wish that people could grow up and act their age some days. It is so pathetic that it had to come to this. It was such a minor thing in the first place that should have never been blown into a situation having the police called. I guess that people just don’t realize that the father could have been jailed and the child taken into protective custody. I am just thankful that they had kind and understanding police officers that responded to the call. Thank you Salem Police Department.
My husband and his best friend are very much into the Xbox 360 first person shooter games. I love the fact that they can sit and play as well as talk to one another about anything. I find it very interesting that it is such a unique way for them to bond.
I have been asked by several people about why I don’t get angry when he plays his game. So I have decided to use this post to clear up any misunderstandings about this.
First of all it happens to be a great stress reliever for him. After a really long and especially difficult day working from home or when he just needs some time to him self, I have found that this is more of his “man-cave”, and it seems to do wonders for him. It seems to be a way for him to express himself via an online source that is not his computer which he stares at what seems like all of the time.
Secondly I do happen to enjoy watching him play. I don’t really know why but it helps to relieve some stress for me as well. I have just begun to play Call of Duty; Modern Warfare, and don’t get me wrong I SUCK. However it seems to helped me to get over some of my motion sickness. Which is excellent, I did not used to be able to watch let alone play. I am able to sit on my bed and watch and learn. We have conversations and it is a good way for us to be together while both doing things that we enjoy, separately.
Thirdly; how can I complain when he works from home and is willing to stay home most evenings. Don’t get me wrong he comes out and spends some very quality time with our children during the day and after work. I just look at some of my friends and family whose husbands are out all night at the bar, gambling or god knows where else. How fortunate am I that my husband works hard all day, provides very well for our family, as well as having something that can entertain him when he needs to blow off some steam or just wants to play. With out having to worry about where he is, what he is doing, etc.
I am not saying that I don’t want for him to go out and do things because I encourage those things, but I just discover new ways that I love him even more every day. He is so patient (especially when I am not), he is so kind (hardly ever raises his voice, and never out of anger), he works soooo hard (which is something is so hard to find in a mid twenties man these days), he provides for his family in this tough economic time and he doesn’t complain when I don’t feel well and didn’t get something done.
So really I want to know, why would I be so demanding and horrible to take away his major source for stress relief? I just hope that maybe there will be a better understanding about this subject, not that I should have to justify anything in our marriage to anyone.
I know that I am not perfect by any stretch of the imagination, and that I would hope that if I had a hobby, or an activity that I did once my children were asleep for the night that someone would not take that away from me. It is one of those don’t take my iPod with my Millionaire game and my Tap Tap Revenge 3 away. I don’t think that would be pretty.
I just wish that more people could discuss things without the feeling of judgment. I don’t think that it is fair to anyone involved, even the by standers near by. So when talking to your friends and family about life if something doesn’t make sense to you it does not mean that it is not the perfect solution for another person or family.
