Well lets give a family update;

Shaun, My dearest husband. He got a new job. (Well in January of 2009) It is so neat, and I couldn’t be more proud of him and the work that he is doing. The company is a very small one in Northern Washington, and he has the ability to work from home which has been a blessing. I believe that there are only 7 people in the entire company. I remember when he started that I was really apprehensive about the change from a salaried person to an hourly wage. But it has all worked out wonderfully. He is finally being appreciated in a way that makes him enjoy his work. which is something that he was missing at his previous employer. This company is a very interesting one, and they do some very unique things which is a positive. The couple that are the owners of this business are deeply religious and very sweet. I do not believe that the wife (Maryann) has a mean bone in her body and is just a wonderful person, cook and mother. I have visited there with Shaun once for a Christmas party, and it was amazing, Just the simplicity of their lives and how at peace they are amongst the chaos that is most urban lives is just amazing. I wish that I could live like that. (sometimes)

However, with this new job have come new challenges as a married couple. Shaun is working from home now in our bedroom/office, so we are together all of the time. Even though we are together so much in the same house, we don’t really see him during the day. Unless he is hungry or is running low on nerd fuel. (Mountain Dew Code Red) I have to say that I really enjoy the time that he gets to spend with me and our children. It is so neat to think that even though he works himself to brain mush some days that he gets to see our children grow and learn things just about as much as I do.  I believe that we are so very fortunate in that regard and they don’t even know it. I guess all children are that way in some aspects. I am glad that they have a dad that is so involved in their lives. If they have a problem, want some Dairy Queen in the middle of the day right around break time or just need a hug from their dad he is always available. I love it, and so do they.

Our oldest child, Alex was asking me why all daddies couldn’t stay home and work. It was a tough sell to explain that there are different jobs around the world and mommies and daddies have to do them. It is just one of those things that he doesn’t realize about. I can’t complain about the comprehension of the workforce at 5 years old though. Lol

On Friday February 5th I have Alex’s preschool conference to discuss his transition into Kindergarten. I have to say that I am kinda nervous about this transition. Since Alex is autistic there are lots of challenges that must be over come on a daily basis and I am afraid that this transition will be quite difficult for him as well as us. For anyone who lives with autism everyday change is not too fun. I am so glad that he has completed a year and a half of preschool. I think that it has created some very wonderful progress for him especially in the area of speech. I can’t believe that just over 2 years ago he had about 20 words and how he has a wonderful vocabulary. Learning new words and pronunciations each day. White is my favorite word that he says now. He was saying wipe instead of white so now when he says it he says WhiTTe, with a ton of emphasis on the T. It’s great.

Our middle child Caitlin just turned 3 a few months ago and is doing very well. She is dang near fully potty trained. (Yay 2 down 1 to go.) It is such a nice feeling not to have to purchase two sizes or types of diapers. We are still keeping her in a pull up for night time and some times during naps. But I can’t really complain. It surely makes a package of pull ups last much longer. I can’t believe some times that she is only three. She is such a well behaved child. For the most part she is very soft spoken and loves everyone as well as everything. I think about what she will become as an adult some times, she is so intelligent like her father that I hope she becomes rocket scientist or cures cancer or something of that nature. But who knows and we will be proud of her no matter what she does or accomplishes. I just hope that it will be something great.

The baby in the family Brinley, boy oh boy is she a handful. I have to say that she keeps all of us on our toes. She like her sister is very smart and she knows it. I know that she is only 22 months old but she is getting herself undressed now (even when I don’t want her to) and she can count to 10. I was in shock the first time that she did it. I do have to say that she is truly my child, very outspoken, loud gosh is she loud and stubborn. But she is also very much her father’s child. She loves him so much that there are days that I am totally jealous because it seems like I am just chopped liver with onions. But I would feel horrible if she didn’t have an incredible relationship with her father. I do know however that she can operate my iPod better and more efficiently, she can operate a computer, send text messages via cell phone, and if it wasn’t for her I would have never discovered how to turn the subtitles on my television. She just hacked the cable box and got me to where I needed to be. I couldn’t believe it. I almost wonder if she will follow in her father’s footsteps and be a developer or something related to computers. She just loves them so much.

We are now living in a beautiful home in Keizer and are out of the flats of West Salem. (thank god) So Shaun has an office/bedroom where he can get some peace while working during the day. Our back yard has a fountain and pond, and we live right with a park right behind us. It is so wonderful and peaceful here. We live on a small dead end street with wonderful neighbors. There are no wild parties, no one is obnoxious or anything. Couldn’t ask for more, especially since we have a large beautiful kitchen with massive amounts of cupboard space and counter tops. The icing on the cake for me was that we have a large bathroom with walk in closet, linen closet as well as a very large SPA TUB!!! How wonderful is that? A spa tub. This house is so perfect for us that I can’t believe that we fell into it so perfectly. The only thing is that we are renting but the owner of the home is a very neat man and has taken care of anything that has come up during our tenancy no matter how small. I love it.

Living in Keizer has been very neat especially that there is Keizer Station so close. So nice in fact that my good friend just moved in across the street. She is expecting her third child in early April so we are enjoying that we are so close and can help one another out with out having to depend on our parents and grandparents. I think that it has helped us both as mothers since we can be so honest with one another about things that are going on in our lives with out fear of judgment from anyone else. It’s nice, and I really enjoy having someone that I can depend on and relate to so close. I am starting to work on her baby shower since she is having her first boy, and her husband says that their son cannot allow her baby boy to wear pink. I suppose that is a valid argument.

Well it is after 11 pm and I should be headed to bed here shortly, so I am going to go and utilize my spa tub so have a good night, and thanks for being patient with me after such a long dead period.

www.twitter.com/slkester

Here are some pics of us getting pumpkins at EZ Orchards pumpkin patch

We had alot of fun there and ended up with over 130 lbs. of Pumpkins between our family and my friend Lori and her daughter Ana. There was a petting zoo, pony rides, a corn maze and a hay ride. It was a good way to kill an afternoon.

I will have to get the pictures of the kids on their halloween costumes after while. Have a good one!!!!

Don’t get me wrong I love them, I really do, they just drive me insane. I have been so accustomed to working my whole life even after my other two were born that for me to have been home as long as I have been was excruciating. There are days when I wish that I could just stay home and be with my kids so that I know everything about them and their day. But for us we need both incomes so I am hoping that with me back to work that it will relieve some of our household stress.

I am working for a construction restoration company in Stayton ,Oregon. I love it. My boss is great. He is a really nice guy that is really laid back, which is perfect for me. I can’t stand to be micromanaged. Don’t get me wrong he is there when I need him or have a question but for the most part he lets me do my thing.

The hours are flexible for my kids (which is an absolute necessity) and the pay is not too bad. The only thing that I really don’t like about it is that I have to drive about 20 miles to get to work.

Well gotta go, Brinley is complaining and I am headed out the door to work. Have a good one.

So Sunday March 23rd, 2008, at 8 am I am going to be going to the hospital and being induced. I hope that all goes well, and I don’t have to have a c-section or anything like that. I was induced with my son and I almost had to have a c- section and I was so scared and delivered normally on the operating table. So I am a little nervous about the whole thing, but it is an excited nervous.

I know that my husband is quite nervous as well. But I think that is because he has been having dreams that I have died or there is something that has happened to the baby during delivery. I must admit I too have had these kinds of dreams but as far as I have heard they are normal. (I hope that they are)

So the day after I have the baby I am going into surgery to have my tubes tied. I have to go under with general anesthesia less than 24 hours after I have the baby. I don’t really know how to deal with that yet. I don’t think that anything is going to go bad because I trust the Doctors and Anesthesiologists to perform everything correctly, but there is always that chance. So that is a little nerve racking, but here’s hoping.

There were so many times that I had prepared myself for his passing and he would get better, and be fine. It has gone on like this for a couple of years. It was really hard to see. I know that he is in a better place depending on what you believe, but at least he is not gasping for air and suffering with all of the pain he was dealing with. I should have known that this was coming because they just put him in a care home considering that my great-grandmother could not care for him alone anymore. Well it was not her choice hospice basically told her that was what they were doing and she had better adjust. I cannot even begin to imagine what that must have felt like for her. They were married for over 65 years and never spent time away from one another. (Except for the war) That is an extremely difficult thing to understand. I do not know what to do with my self now when my husband is away. I cannot even begin to imagine what I would do with out him for the rest of my life. I am really afraid that I am going to loose her now that he is gone.

Have you ever thought that you had absolutely too much on your plate at once? My husband is starting his new business venture, I am trying to potty train my 3 year old, I am 8 months pregnant, our financial status is in the shitter, and now I just lost my grandfather that basically raised me. People keep telling me how sorry they are for me. I don’t want to be felt sorry for I just want to feel like I can make forward progress somewhere in my life.

I guess I just have a lot of miss placed anger towards a lot of people at the moment. I don’t really even know why I am angry I just don’t think I know how to cope any other way. I tried crying but that just made everything I was feeling worse. I tried ignoring it, and that didn’t work so I am just at a total loss for words on how to express what I am feeling. To tell the truth I don’t even really know how I am feeling.

One of the things that is the hardest is that he made us all promise that we would NOT have a service, celebration of life, or anything related to that. So he is going to be cremated and his final resting place will be in Portland, Oregon at the Willamette National Cemetery. That is where they put veterans here in Oregon.

I just hope that this pain won’t last forever and someday I will be able to move on from what I am feeling right now. I know that day will come I just wish that I had some idea of when.

I am sure that this post is more than you wanted to know about me and my family I just didn’t know where else I could vent with out hurting anyone’s feelings, and I have been told that when grieving that putting what you are feeling in writing it helps you to let go of them. So here’s hoping that it works. Thanks for reading if you actually made it all the way to the end through my ramblings.

]]> http://skfoxy.com/2008/02/08/i-just-lost-my-grandpa/feed/ 2 http://skfoxy.com/2008/02/01/my-cousin-is-getting-married/ http://skfoxy.com/2008/02/01/my-cousin-is-getting-married/#comments Fri, 01 Feb 2008 18:27:31 +0000 Sarah http://skfoxy.com/2008/02/01/my-cousin-is-getting-married/ It should be a joyous day when our two families are going to be joined right? Well not so much… Her Bridal Shower is on the 9th and I really don’t want to go. Well let me rephrase none of our family wants to go. By now I am sure that you think we are all jerks or something but really we aren’t. The problem stems from the fact that she is only 17, and he is 21. Her wedding is scheduled 2 or 3 days after her 18th birthday next month. But I think that we could even over look that in our family but then this is her FIRST BOYFRIEND and they have only been dating for the last 5 or 6 months. Come on grow a brain…. That is what I want to say as I smack her on the back of the head.

So my mom and grandma and even her dad are like can’t you talk to her and try to get her to change her mind? Well I am probably not going to be able to do anything to change her mind. But they seem to think that since I did the very same thing and made those mistakes that I am going to be more convincing? I ran off with a guy that was 36 when I was 18. (The day I turned 18) We got married, and he beat the hell out of me, all of which she knows. I didn’t listen to anyone what makes them think that she is any different? I don’t know is is really frustrating.

Then to top it off his family is really sick. Like in the head. They know exactly how long they have been together, how old she is etc. and they are pushing it. Almost demanding that they get married, so that they can live there with them. Like I said sick.

Looking back in the post I realized that I forgot a large factor in our frustration. She is not even pregnant. Not that it is a reason to get married or anything but it would make sense on why the urgency. I just wish that she would wait even if it was only 6 months, or live together for a while first because it is so hard to live with another person and she has had no life experiences to go off of. She was totally sheltered.

I guess that I had better get a gift though. I don’t think that even if she did want out of it at this point that his family would let her with out a fight. Oh what to do… I hate this situation.

Thanks for listening though…

I am so excited. Welcome to my blog. I have absolutely no idea what I am doing but I am managing to do it all on my own at the moment. I am so proud!!

My husband has a blog and all that good stuff and I usually just use his if I have something that I need to say. But I had mentioned casually that I would be interested in doing one and this is what he presented me with this evening. I am just so excited…

I hadn’t ever really thought about creating a blog until I discovered another womans blog and she asked me why I didn’t have one. Well I didn’t have a good answer… (kinda felt dumb to tell you the truth for not having an intelligent answer or at least a snappy comeback lol) But here is a link to her blog I am so grateful for her asking me that because I don’t think that I would have ever taken the initiative to do it on my own. So thank you for the push in the right direction.
I never would have found her blog had it not been for this wonderful thing that my husband set me up with called Stumble Upon. Now I am absolutely addicted to it and I can’t wait for updates.

Well Since this is my first post I guess I had better tell you a little bit about me. I am a 22 year old stay at home mom. I have a 3 year old boy named Alexander (Alex). Let me tell you he is a hand full. I am in the midst of having him tested for Autism so things are interesting to say the least. But then I have a beautiful daughter Catilin. She is 16 Months old. Boy is she sweet. (Well most of the time lol) My husband is a very devoted and loving father. I don’t know how I ever managed with out him. I am hoping that I never have to find out what I would do with out him again. Shaun (my hubby) is a web developer and works very hard creating websites, writing software, and what ever else it is that he does. I get confused. But that I blame on the pregnancy.

I didn’t realize that it was so late. Wow I have to go to bed or I will never get up in the morning. Have a good one…